“From that time Jesus began to proclaim, ‘Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.”—Matthew 4:17 (N.R.S.V.)
“How you gon’ win if you ain’t right within? Uh uh, come again.”—Lauryn Hill, Doo Wop (That Thing)
A Short Introduction
Generally speaking, I struggle with the idea of repentance. It brings to mind people on street corners threatening that I will go to hell. In the Bible, too, I have struggled to process what Jesus’ calls for repentance really mean.
An Explanation
My intention isn’t blasphemy. Over the years, I have truly been puzzled as to how to engage in/achieve repentance. For instance, must one live in a monastery, feed the hungry, sell all possessions, abstain from drinking, take a vow of chastity?
If you’re like me, you have a tendency to internalize the act of repentance as the need to pursue some level of perfectionism that is unattainable, frustrating, and discouraging. The remains of which are a persistent sense of failure and shame.
A Welcome Change in Perspective
While reading Matthew this summer, I came across the verse quoted above. This time, though, I looked up the word’s original meaning. The word translated as “repent” comes from the Greek word “metanoeite.” It means to think differently or afterwards; to reconsider.1
After having read the definition, instead of the familiar pressure to figure out how to repent, to be good enough for the One who created me, I came away with a different interpretation. Like Lauryn, Jesus invites us to “come again,” or, in the words of Ice Cube, to “check yo’ self before you wreck yo’ self.”
Sorry. I really couldn’t help myself. Now, here’s the non-nineties-hip-hop version:
Jesus’ words are an invitation to reexamine something that may cause/be causing harm to us as well as others.
Repentance in Action
A while back I realized I’m not always as kind to the people that I love as I want to be. Naturally, I had all kinds of reasons to justify my behavior, but, in the end, none of my justifications mattered. I was in the wrong.
I call these realizations “God moments.” And, in that moment, I was being invited to reconsider my behavior and reflect on who I want to be in this life.
I ultimately decided I didn’t want to spend my life pushing away the people I love to better hold on to resentments that were killing me.
In my experience, these opportunities to reconsider continue to show up periodically, presenting options for growth, change, and a better approach to living.
Meanwhile—hard to believe, I know— my quest for perfection has yet to bear fruit, but, thankfully, progress hasn’t proved to be as evasive.
Parting Thoughts
In the spirit of New Year’s resolutions, then, I enter this year—and I hope every year that may come—willing to reconsider.
- The Greek word and definition is as presented in the entry for Matthew 4:17 on biblehub.com. ↩︎
